Optimum Wound Profile

26 april 2011

Wat maf joh. Op de een of andere manier moest ik vanavond denken aan de oerdegelijke spuugherrie van de band Optimum Wound Profile. Je gelooft het niet, maar zulke muziek staat hier ook in de kast. Nu zocht ik een digitale variant van de uiterst donkere tekst die in het boekje van die cd staat en die vond ik. Wat bleek? Ik zette die tekst ooit zelf op een of ander forum, in oktober 1999.

Het is raar, om 12 jaar teruggeslingerd te worden in de tijd. Veel platformen van toen zijn inmiddels van het web verdwenen, voorgoed. Maar niet dit forum dus, en niet deze depressieve tekst. Je zou er bijna vrolijk van worden 🙂

Sitting alone with only my radiator for company. My pathetic necessity to swirl in my own life blood riles me. After years forlorn filled with uncounted millions of tireless illusions ans sanitised reasons for a world of crippled disgust here i sit I shed my scares when i realised how fucking puerile my optimism had become.

My thoughts? Never ending delusions, deceiving conclusions, random monotony, emotional blowouts. Yeah, my thoughts really hurt now. I can see the mistakes of a personal world where my only reality was confusion. I tried crawling under the dirt to hide my upside smiles, dismembering my attitude, my blind nakedness an integrated monstrosity. Soon the scum started dripping, testering in every hole and oozing from cracks that i avoided with care. All the decorations on white lies the distorted truth. I withdrew in non disturbed solitude. I held a monopoly over honesty. All the passions vomit the harsh reality of an egocrotch society. All my eternally anticipated worthless hope was gone in an instant now.

I’m just downmouth. A prestidigitator of taken familiar distort in the hell i call my mind. I destroyed any feelings for the melt that i held still and forced myself inside out so nobody would recognize me. I thought i’d stayed too long so this insular pining for self damnation, my own desecration, remains my only hole in sanity.  It doesn’t have to be this way anymore. My last refuge. I’m alcohol accumulating so as to nullify the mind into a state capable only of dreams of self destruction. It’s up to me to decide but I don’t want to contemplate the decision. Took a head full of tranqs these fucking depressant are depressing. I guess my waste would ultimately be everyone’s gain. Now i hold the fearshard key to life and death in my hand. I can only move to gain the optimum wound profile and to make that incision. My vision oscilates. I played with damage

and that looks like blood

(from lowest common dominator by Optimum Wound Profile-1992)

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